Democracy can be messy. Here's how the White House is dealing with it.

The US Constitution grants every US citizen the right to petition the government. 

When President Obama took office in 2008 his administration immediately set plans into motion to open up a more transparent petition process for US citizens. This effort was one of the hallmark efforts for the President’s plan to digitize the government and while the president and his administration had all of the best interests in promoting a digital platform for democracy there have been several proposals and petition made to the US government.

They range from righteous indignation to utterly ridiculous and downright silly. Here are nine of some of the most notable petitions submitted to the wethepeople.gov website.

1. Secede from the Union

Taken together, all of the petitions with requests to sucede from the union come to about 69 different petitions that cover all 50 states. Many of these petitions, like the infamous Texas petition for secession, were submitted after Obama first won the Presidency.

And after the British secession from the EU the twitter-sphere imploded with more talk of the Great State of Texas becoming its own nation (again).

By loading the tweet, you agree to Twitter’s privacy policy.
Learn more

Load tweet

It’s pretty safe to say that The White House is going to stick to its original response of to secession-enthusiasts, “Whether it’s figuring out how to strengthen our economy, reduce our deficit in a responsible way, or protect our country, we will need to work together — and hear from one another — in order to find the best way to move forward.”

 

2. Deport everyone who signed the petition to secede from the Union

This is a quick and fairly straightforward petition that simply asks the administration to “deport everyone who signed a petition to secede from the United States of America.”

 

3. Require Congressmen & Senators to wear logos of their financial backers on their clothing, much like NASCAR drivers do.

The idea here is that elected officials should be required to wear the logos of their sponsors on their clothing. This proposal includes a recommendation to vary the size of the clothing according to the donated amount.

While the idea itself is highly unlikely to occur, the existence of the petition does accurately capture some members of the US public’s disgust with the amount of money in US politics.

4. Designate a National White Genocide Day

Well, the Constitution does give every citizen the right to petition the government and that still extends to white supremacists. It’s unlikely that anything will come of this petition which closed with a mere 1,000 signatures.

5. Replace the Federal Judicial System with Motorcycle-Riding Judges

If it sounds ridiculous, it’s because it is. The petition asks to “to dissolve the current legal system and replace it with a single Hall of Justice, run by Judges; motorcycle-riding law officers who act as police, judge, jury, and executioner.” It gathered a total of 1,206 signatures from hard-working Americans who also seem to think that the US justice system could benefit from more motorcycles.

6. Nationalize the Twinkie industry

The petition reads, “We the undersigned, hereby request Barack Obama to immediately nationalize the Twinkie industry and prevent our nation from losing her sweet creamy center.” Give America’s weakness for sweets it’s no surprise that this petition gathered a total of 3,998 signatures.

7. Secure resources and funding, and begin construction of a Death Star by 2016

This is easily one of the more entertaining proposals with 34,435 signature and plenty of wisdom for future military investments. According to the petition, “by focusing our defense resources into a space-superiority platform and weapon system such as a Death Star, the government can spur job creation in the fields of construction, engineering, space exploration, and more, and strengthen our national defense.”

And, just in case you thought the US Government and its affiliate organizations weren’t going to take this seriously–the kind folks over at NASA are already conducting some unofficial research.

 

By loading the tweet, you agree to Twitter’s privacy policy.
Learn more

Load tweet

Keeping in line with the intergalactic-themed military vehicles…..

8. First Generation “USS Enterprise” Starship

Hey—advanced technological developments through Research and Development are real and legitimate policy goals. And, as an avid Star Trek fan, I see no reason why an intergalactic space station should be cut out of the picture until we’ve explored all options.

The proposal reads: We have within our technological reach the ability to build the 1st generation of the USS Enterprise. It ends up that this ship’s inspiring form is quite functional. This will be Earth’s first gigawatt-class interplanetary spaceship with artificial gravity.

9. Deport British citizen Piers Morgan for attacking the Second Amendment

In a terrifying display of solidarity over 100,000 US citizens signed this petition to have Piers Morgan deported for calling for more sensible gun-control laws in the US.

“British Citizen and CNN television host Piers Morgan is engaged in a hostile attack against the U.S. Constitution by targeting the Second Amendment. We demand that Mr. Morgan be deported immediately for his effort to undermine the Bill of Rights and for exploiting his position as a national network television host to stage attacks against the rights of American citizens.”